Photoshop Friday Presents: Pirates and Yoga Both Make Me Need a Shower

Photoshop Friday Presents: Pirates and Yoga Both Make Me Need a Shower

So, I've been trying to integrate yoga in my lifestyle (you know, like rich people do on T.V.), in 30-minute workout segments, and try to get this whole "calm down" deal going after long days at school.  But, yesterday was the first time I actually completed an ENTIRE hour of it.  

OH. SWEET. SWASHBUCKLER. 

I think rich people just love to do painful things to their bodies that are supposed to feel good - you know, like cocaine.  In case you didn't know this, I'm a sweater; not like a pink, fuzzy, "ooh this is cashmere!" sweater, but like, a sweat-er, and it is gross (I'm forever jealous of Barbra Walters because she never sweats, ever, but that's just a little factoid about her/me and completely beside the point).  So, after I unraveled myself from what was probably NOT supposed to be a pretzel-thing, I took a shower. 

Once I got out, I decided to work on my "Photoshop Friday" pic of "me" with Johnny Depp, aka Capt. Jack Sparrow, and realized how sexy pirates are.

Then, I needed another shower.

I know this probably goes around a lot, but it does so for a reason: Johnny Depp is one of the hottest actors in the history of ...EVER. I don't know if anyone's ever seen him do interviews, but he's completely different as himself than his is when he's on the screen, and I find that so compelling.  It's the charm, dear!  Shy in real life, but totally crazy as someone else.  He get soooo into character, I love it, and even relate to it a bit.  Johnny Depp/Jack Sparrow definitely changed my outlook on pirates.  What is it exactly about pirates that make them so damn sexy? (You know, except for missing teeth. I can handle the dreadlocks and the drunkenness, but poor hygiene? No thank you.) It wasn't always like this, was it?  I mean, one minute I'm debating if Mister Smee from Peter Pan is Santa's long-lost, unloved, and disowned half-brother, and the next I'm wondering if Jack Sparrow's gold  tooth can be made into a ring Kim Kardashian would hate me for. I'd run away with him quicker than the dish ran away with the spoon. Savvy??

All in all, the verdict stands: Pirates are hot ("Bad Boy" complex, perhaps?), and Yoga is hella hard. No wonder rich people are always complaining.

Ciao. Swash-Buckle-Swagger.

[P.S. - I actually do like yoga. Like, fo'realz. If you get a chance, try it! Staying still is one of the hardest things you can teach yourself to do - mentally, physically, and emotionally. It's challenging, fun, and is probably much cheaper than cocaine. Feel good and try yoga! *End of sales pitch*]